Playing Posh: Afternoon Tea at Claridge’s

Before moving to London last month I started making a mental list of British things I wanted to make sure I accomplished over the next year. High up on that list was to have afternoon tea. So, when my roommate casually mentioned that she had made reservations at Claridge’s, a famous five star hotel in Mayfair, some 10 months ago for afternoon tea and could probably add me to the booking, I was ecstatic.

This weekend my dreams of sandwiches with no crusts and tea cakes came true.

On Saturday I washed my hair, put on a knee length dress, and tried to curb my sailor like language for a day of feeling fancy. The five of us girls arrived a little early for our 1 pm reservation. We were offered reading material while we sat on plush couches and watched trolleys of Louis Vuitton luggage roll by.

Did I mentioned yet that super fancy places me feel super awkward?

They do.

(Mostly because I have the grace of a falling elephant.)

We were soon seated in the tea room, adjacent to the main dining room, and handed menus containing pages and pages of tea from all over the world. I chose a lavender Early Grey, a nice harmony of traditional English and floral infusion.

Before any food was served, we were each poured a glass of champagne. Champagne which was probably much more expensive than anything I’ve ever tried because I actually liked it. A nice start to the afternoon.

The first course brought to us was plates of tea sandwiches. Claridge’s took some of the more traditional tea sandwich offerings and added a sense of refinement. Each plate held five types of sandwich: smoked salmon, horseradish, and lemon cream; cucumber, whipped creme fraiche, and rocket; ham, smoked tomate chutney, and watercress; organic chicken Waldorf; and duck egg, mayonnaise, and mustard. I would say I had a favorite but since the five of us polished off five plates of these, I think it’s safe to say we enjoyed them all.

After the sandwich remnants were removed, the tea was poured and the table covered with plates containing scones piled high and delicate pastries. I immediately grabbed a plain scone from the pile, avoiding the raisin ones, and started slatering on the clotted cream and Marco Polo gelee (just a fancy word for jam, apparently).

It was at this point that things took a turn for the more normal (for us). We decided that one glass of champagne would not suffice. A bottle of white wine was ordered and arrived just in time for me to tuck into the pastries.

Each of us were given four to try: vanilla mille-feuille, a blackberry tart with vanilla mousseline, a hazelnut brownie topped with banana cream and chocolate, and a Dundee cake, which I stayed away from as it appeared to be filled with all sorts of dried fruit. This round had a clear winner. The chocolate banana brownie concoction tasted like a combination of banoffee pie and this Entenmann’s cake I used to be obsessed with as a child. And I mean that in the best possible way.

Now that we had eaten ourselves to the point of pain we figured we’d try to drink away then pain. Naturally, this meant another bottle of wine. And a degression into loud, less-than-appropriate-for-afternoon-tea discussions.

Two and a half hours after our reservation began we were asked to leave our table because another party had a booking. We were escorted into a dimly lit, wood paneled room. What were we given for our troubles?

A free bottle of wine!

And with that I can safely say that both the food and the customer service at Claridge’s afternoon tea are top notch.

Visitor Info: The afternoon tea with one glass of champagne costs £56 per person plus a 12% service charge. A booking is required and they recently changed their policy and only take them 3 months in advance. Claridge’s is located at the corner of Brook Street and Davis Street in Mayfair. The closest tube stop is Bond Street which is on the Central line.

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